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不知不觉,已经是奔二的人了。以前的一些事情,想起来觉得时光飞逝,但又觉得好遥远。
父母变了,最重要的是变老了。爸的肩周炎虽然差不多好了,可是鼻窦炎还是老样子,天天吃药,天天吃药。妈倒是没怎么觉察出来,倒是变得更固执了,和奶奶一样固执,或许母亲一类都很难接受新事物吧。
曾经看过一句话,说父母耗尽了自己的心血才把子女抚养长大,所谓我们大了的时候,就是父母老了的时候。十五六岁的时候,笼中鸟的翅膀长大了,他想飞出鸟笼看看外面的世界。而十九岁的时候,他回来告诉父母,外面的世界真的很精彩,嗯,It’s a big world out there. 父母只是笑着告诉他,在年轻的时候,他们也曾经在远方闯荡,如此而已。父母知道以前的笼中鸟已经起了变化,他们小时候就希望他能是鹓雏。然而,鸟不知道自己是否还能够成为真正的所谓凤凰。
今天在席上,他们在讨论为什么孩子要比父母出色。我对奶奶说:“‘子弟何豫人事而正欲使其佳?’‘譬如芝兰玉树,欲使其生于庭阶耳。’”因为这句话影响了魏晋的士族风气。奶奶明白,她还是唠叨着自己的意见。老人家总是固执。
这么多年了,虽然我是很健忘的人,甚至无法连续地回忆起一件事情,但是还有好多的细节。几个月的时候舅婆的照看。三岁的时候,第一次上幼儿园,我害怕得又跑回了爸爸的单位。在幼儿园,奶奶守在床边看我们睡午觉。星期六中午将我和表姐接过去玩。和爷爷抢吃梨子。在平房的时候,五六岁,蒲丹跑到我家来看彩色电视。在学校天天比赛转圈和飞纸飞机。七岁的时候在舅公那学书法,天天和春雷一起临帖,洗毛笔,被舅公训斥。和同学打架,结果发现自己真的不是打架的材料。住在顶楼的时候,那是八九岁,跑到蒲丹家玩她的玩具象,可以自己卷鼻子的那种。用铁丝自己编玩具。和二表姐打水仗,还有二表姐家的保姆。二舅舅常常过来在楼顶睡觉因为那里比较凉快。妈妈做的“猫耳朵”。十岁的时候,爸爸送我一套搭电路的玩具。还有那辆敞蓬的遥控跑车。十一岁的时候,和王典一起睡在她家的地板上。十二岁的时候,考上遂中,那个时候正在和周飞打水仗,把家里弄得到处都是水,妈妈高兴地将我举起来。十三岁,浅尝辄止。十四岁开始变得不乖,和父母吵架,和朋友出去玩。不过还是认识了好像可以交往一生的朋友岑,君子之交淡如水。十五岁,在初三的班级里,开始和老师吵嘴,养成了挑作业做的坏习惯,让现在的我都感到内疚……
一打开匣子,回忆就腾得全往外冒。而现在奔二的我,才渐渐开始明白长大的意义。谁说过小时候的我们都曾经幻想过一夜长大,而长大后的我们却为没享受过的童年感到失落。失落的是在我的童年里,没有捕蜻蜓和蝴蝶,却抓过癞蛤蟆。谁能保证在今后,我能不犯这些像模像样的小错误呢?
岁月不待人。我也有变老的时候,到时候是否还能像祖辈一样活得那么自在呢?
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